i stretched my hamstrings as a cheap australian drama droned on the tv the background - someone loves someone - things shouldn’t be so complicated, i thought to myself - it was cold and dark outside, but i didn’t mind - i was used to it - you see, im the weirdo in the dark jacket who walked the streets at night - i am the reason you’re needlessly afraid to walk home at night— but no - not me - i’m harmless
as i opened the front door, a charge of cold air filled my lungs and stung my body - i run old school - short shorts, light singlet, digital watch - i run ten kilometres every night - strangely, i can’t sleep without it - i pushed through the first step, and begun my stride - light and smooth - up and down the suburban streets - the black night and gold street lights providing just enough to give me a sense of where it is i am, and where im going
i smell the warm curry dinners cooking - i smell the woodfires burning - i sense the soup - every now and again, i get a glimpse of the fuzzy neon blue as families watch their cheap australian dramas - there is a great feeling of satisfaction runners like myself experience - its the pumping speed of your legs and the muscles that fuel them, against the calm flow, the patiences and control of the air in your lungs - in, and out, slowly, while your legs move and act like mad-men on the loose, after years in the hole - but nah, there’s nothing going on here - there’s nothing crazy about me
i’ve been chased by dogs - swooped by birds and attacked by ducks - i’ve been spooked by possums, and sure, i’ve done my share of spooking too - i’ve had near misses and close calls - ive given sweet-girl-p-platers stern shakes of the head as they run their red-lights - i’ve puked outside a church, as an alcoholics-anonymous meeting came to a close - i hear the yells from passing cars - some complimentary, most not - i’ve seen it all, while you were sleeping
though there wasn’t much to that night - a lazy moon somewhere, some fading stars struggling against the clouds - i felt good, though i’d be lying if i didnt admit to feeling a little nervous - it was wednesday night, and with each turn, left or right, i was jolted with a thrill knowing i was getting closer - i was on my way - i was heading in the right direction
her house was down a dark tree-lined street, and it was bin night — shrubs and bushes lined her driveway - as i stopped before it, i felt the sweat on my face and shoulders cool and chill - my breath filled the air in front of me, as i walked up the driveway as if i owned the place - its the only way - my nerves held my breath, but i so desperately wanted to breathe - i wanted to breathe the same air she breathes - but for that, i’d have to wait
upon nearing the back gate, i noticed a car lighting up the dark street behind me - knowing the best reaction was to stay calm, i casually opened the back gate and entered the backyard - i thought i’d blown it - i prepared myself to bolt and run away - over the neighbours fence, through their garage and back out onto the opposite street, just as i had seen and planned on google-maps, in case of a situation like this - i waited for the call and question, but nothing came - i crouched in the darkness behind a small tree in the backyard, and turned around to see a young man, delivering a pizza
i heard his knock on the door, and i heard the quick muffled footsteps inside move towards answering it - hearing her movements warmed me - pizza night, i thought to myself, relieved, but still shaken with stiff nerves - no matter how much i strained, i couldn’t hear their exchange - i so desperately wanted to know what kind of pizza she ordered - my head lowered, my eyes closed, but i couldn’t make it out - margarita perhaps? supreme maybe - definitely not bbq-chicken - eventually i settled, thinking margarita made sense - that was her favourite, i could tell - spiced and scented herbs - with a loud thank-you and see-ya later, the pizza-guy stomped back to his car, reversed out the driveway, and drove away - leaving us alone
i swiftly moved to a more secluded bush - the light from the kitchen window lit the backyard up in dim shades - i could barely make out what was in front of me, but that was how i liked it - the element of surprise
the clothes-line was perhaps four meters away from my sanctum, exposed in the centre of the backyard - as though it were on display - parading - a cool night breeze passed over it’s treasures - i watched their movements and took a deep breath - it was fully loaded - i had planned this well, and felt a sense of pride - i took my moment, and i soaked it up - as if moving on instinct alone, i dashed from my leafy den and took to the clothesline - my altar - my holy grail - my goddess
i pulled out the plastic zip-lock bag from the back of my shorts as i crept - standing up amongst the shirts, skirts and tea-towels, i found myself surrounded by an intoxicating cloud of underpants - bonds were her favourite - i could tell - while i was in the opportunity to gather many pairs, i practised discipline, and snatched the one pair of black bonds with a small pink pattern, and snuffed them into the small plastic bag, fumbling a little as i zip-locked them up
stuffing the bag back down my shorts, i noticed from the corner of my wide eyes, a temptation too strong to ignore - the matching bra - it dangled loosely by one of the straps, the night air moving it gently - dare i? - it would raise suspicion, im sure, but the feeling of recklessness was too strong, and it excited me - so i took it to some next-level-shit
as i tried to calm myself and prepare for the casual walk back to the street, i noticed the shades and shadows morph and move across the grass - from my hiding spot, i looked back towards the house and saw her standing before the kitchen window - she posed, pouted and turned a little, looking at her reflection in the window - she chewed a piece of the pizza slice that she held in her hand - i still couldn’t make out what type it was, but i was determined to find out - i watched her and felt my soul warm and sweeten - she wore the perfect pizza-night pony tail, and a loose fitting shirt - i wondered and imagined hard, thinking about what type of underwear she was wearing that night at that very moment— though no matter how hard i tried, i couldn’t work it out - i gave up - those will have to wait
arriving home, i stopped my watch and saw that i ran a pretty good time - not surprising, i guess - 4min 40second kilometres over 10km - inside the heater felt too warm - on the tv a young woman sat on a couch, being consoled by a woman i assumed was her mother - some kind of heart-break i guess
“good run?” my wife asked, sipping on her glass of wine, sitting on the couch
“It was actually - pretty good time - freezing out there though” - i sat down and begun to stretch my legs out - the plastic bag in my shorts made a slight sound, but nothing noticeable
“it’s even freezing in here! i can’t believe you went out tonight” - she had a blanket wrapped around her
“i’m starving” i said - “have we got anything for dinner?”
“there’s some left of lasagne if you want it.”
“nah” i said, standing up to stretch out my calves “lets order a pizza”
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