Friday, January 25, 2013
Art Intimidating Life - The Ruins of my Mental Empire: Part Eighty-Six
i ease back – the faint cool air from the coach air-conditioning gives a surprising amount of relief from the warm summer night, and the warm sun-soaked beers I’d been drinking all evening – with my bag on the seat next to me, I put on my headphones and listened to some cool and smooth jazz music.
the market was a pleasant enough way to pass the three hour wait for the next coach down the highway – a gold coin donation in the form of three fifty cent coins – food stalls circling me like the frozen dead plastic horses on that merry-go-round – the sun was setting and shadows stretched and glittered over everything and everyone – the lines to the food stalls were all long, and the people waiting in them were short and fat – the food looked good though, but I was never going to submit myself to that sort of treatment – around the corner there was a tent selling beer on ice, so I took myself there – how long before the food lines die down? I ask the girl serving me a beer – oh, I dunno, coupla hours I guess – damn... I was hungry
I stroll slowly around the market – stopping here and there to touch some fabrics, browse some t-shirts, toss some hacky-sacks – there was a blues man playing blues on a small stage, and I leaned against a tree and sipped my beer listening to him – strange little children with helium balloons danced out of time to his music – he was alright – he gave out cds of his music for free after his show, and his friends and family hugged and kissed him – after a couple of more beers, I realised there was no use waiting for the lines for food to die down – still adamant I wouldn’t stand in line like that, I approached the polish dumpling tent as it had the smallest line – in fact, it didn’t seem to have a line at all, just a few young couples waiting for their food – I was cool with this – I’d been to Poland and dug their food, a lot – I ordered the lot to go with the three or five beers I’d already drunk and sat down to put some food in my stomach – it was expensive food, but the dumplings were good and I was happy – I sat back on the grass soaked up the scene, watching people walk around looking for an empty table to eat their food at - they're all together, i thought - can they see me?
I got my bag out of the locker at the bus-station – two bags – one with some clothes and books, the other full of booze – beer and scotch – I slid into the mens toilets and holed up in one of the cubicals – lid and seat down, I sat down and carefully poured a good portion of scotch into a half empty bottle of coke – using the toilet window sill as a bar – I wondered if this should be me at an all time low – I don’t know – it felt empowering, badarse, rebellious, and like I was part-taking in an age old tradition laid down by people like me – I took a piss then walked out to the bus-stop
the jazz played slow and cool in my ears – the dusk outside, the tall straw grass waving goodnight to the coast-side setting sun – I eased back in my seat and took long smooth sips of my scotch, synchranisng my mind and my thoughts with the jazz that flowed like syrup in my ears – I felt cool – I melted into an endless sense of relaxation, and watch the world in nature glide by my perfection
the next day I woke early after going to bed late – you see, the night was moon-less, and out there on the coast, sleeping in a house in the trees, the stars were in their millions – together as one, as though it were one beautiful and majestic solid piece of god hanging over me – like a work of art – the meaning and purpose of all art, right there above me – infinite time and space and inspiration – from it, I decided to wake up early and walk to the beach for an early morning swim – morning air, cool and moving - the sand seemingly untouched for billions of star lit nights – a morning haze of fog and salt water filtered the rising sun – the couple of black dots behind the loud waves were surfers, who sat on their boards and bobbed over the forming deep waves – I throw off my tshirt and tuck my glasses and wedding rings into my leather boots – I run into the ocean – each level of wave hits me harder and higher and before I know it, im submerged in the ocean and im awake – the gush as I dive under the crashing waves – streaming as I push myself through the unbroken swells – im a head in the ocean – im a small body floating in the ocean – behind me, land – before me, the rest of the dangerous water world in constant motion - a liquified world smothering the planet with life and lemon jelly - ...tangy
blood moved it's way through my body like my father's red-wine - the trees smelt like dusk, and the birds sang a song to anyone who was listening - i tuned in - my boots kicked the dust - my flannel shirt and the cool sea breeze filtered through the green leafy trees - i took it slow, and climbed up a small mountain - a ridge line - once atop, an endless vision of tree-soaked ranges spread gold - i was alone and high on red-wine and potent beauty of natural-earth - as it should be - as it once was - a floating marble planet (one of the most beautiful i've ever seen) covered in trees standing in a forest, with no-one around to hear them grow tall, or fall with grace from the most natural of deaths - i listened to some psychedelic music as the sun set over the mountain ranges and the beach down below - i was alone, high and holy - a tiny atom in black jeans, kicking against the endless cosmos
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment